By Juveria Ashraf | January 27, 2025 | Mental Health Support | 10 min read
Providing emotional support to someone living with depression.
Depression is one of the most common yet misunderstood mental health conditions in the world. It affects people across all ages, cultures, and backgrounds, often silently. When someone we care about is struggling with depression, it can be difficult to know what to say, how to help, or whether we are doing the right thing at all.
At PANHA, we believe that support begins with understanding, compassion, and informed action. While you cannot "fix" someone's depression, your presence and approach can make a profound difference in their healing journey.
This blog outlines essential do's and don'ts for supporting someone with depression—helping you offer meaningful support while also protecting your own emotional well-being.
Key Takeaway
Supporting someone with depression requires patience, empathy, and boundaries.
Learn 7 essential do's (like active listening and validating feelings) and 7 critical don'ts (like avoiding minimizing their experience).
Your informed support can make a life-changing difference.
Understanding Depression Before Offering Support
Depression is not simply sadness or a temporary emotional low. It is a complex mental health condition that can affect how a person thinks, feels, and functions daily.
Individuals with depression may experience persistent low mood, fatigue, loss of interest in activities, changes in appetite or sleep, feelings of worthlessness, or difficulty concentrating.
Understanding this distinction is crucial. Depression is not a weakness, a lack of gratitude, or something someone can "snap out of."
It requires patience, empathy, and often professional care.
The Do's of Supporting Someone with Depression
1. Do Listen Without Judgment
One of the most powerful things you can offer is genuine, non-judgmental listening. Many people with depression feel unheard or misunderstood. Allow them to express their thoughts and emotions freely without interrupting or rushing to provide solutions.
Simple responses such as:
I'm here for you.
That sounds really difficult.
Thank you for trusting me with this.
can help them feel seen and validated.
2. Do Educate Yourself About Depression
Learning about depression helps reduce stigma and equips you to respond more effectively. Understanding common symptoms, triggers, and treatment options can prevent misinterpretation of behaviors such as withdrawal, irritability, or lack of motivation.
Education also helps you recognize when professional help may be necessary. Consider exploring PANHA's psychology courses to deepen your understanding.
3. Do Encourage Professional Help—Gently
Encouraging therapy or medical support can be life-changing, but it must be done respectfully. Avoid framing it as a failure or ultimatum.
You might say:
Have you thought about talking to a mental health professional?
I can help you find support if you want.
Offer assistance with scheduling appointments or accompanying them if they feel anxious. Learn more about supporting loved ones with mental health issues.
4. Do Offer Practical Support
Depression can make everyday tasks feel overwhelming. Offering small, concrete help can ease their burden:
Helping with meals or groceries
Accompanying them on short walks
Assisting with errands or appointments
Avoid taking over completely; instead, collaborate and empower them.
5. Do Be Patient and Consistent
Recovery from depression is rarely linear. There may be good days and difficult setbacks. Consistency in your support—checking in, showing up, and remaining patient—can provide stability during uncertain times.
Even when progress feels slow, your continued presence matters more than you may realize. This is especially important during difficult transitions, such as supporting someone through a breakup.
6. Do Validate Their Feelings
Validation does not mean agreeing with negative thoughts—it means acknowledging that their feelings are real and painful.
Statements like:
I can see how much you're hurting.
It makes sense that you feel this way.
help reduce feelings of shame and isolation.
7. Do Take Care of Yourself
Supporting someone with depression can be emotionally demanding. Setting healthy boundaries, seeking your own support, and practicing self-care are not selfish—they are necessary.
When you care for yourself, you are better equipped to care for others. Remember the wisdom shared in our guide on family mental health support.
Practicing empathy and patience while supporting mental health.
The Don'ts of Supporting Someone with Depression
1. Don't Minimize Their Experience
Statements such as:
Everyone feels like this sometimes.
Others have it worse.
You should be grateful.
can feel dismissive and invalidating. Even if well-intended, these phrases can deepen feelings of isolation.
Depression is not a comparison—it is a personal experience.
2. Don't Try to 'Fix' Them
You are not responsible for curing someone's depression. Avoid excessive advice-giving or pressure to "think positively."
Instead of solutions, focus on support and presence. Healing often requires professional care and time.
3. Don't Take Their Behavior Personally
Withdrawal, irritability, or lack of communication are often symptoms of depression—not reflections of how they feel about you.
Try not to interpret distance as rejection. Patience and understanding are essential.
4. Don't Force Positivity or Productivity
Encouraging hope is helpful, but forced positivity can feel invalidating. Avoid phrases like:
Just stay positive.
You need to try harder.
Get out and be productive.
Healing happens at its own pace.
5. Don't Ignore Warning Signs
If someone expresses hopelessness, talks about death, or shows signs of self-harm, take it seriously. Avoid assuming they are exaggerating or "seeking attention."
In such cases, professional or emergency support may be necessary.
6. Don't Share Their Story Without Permission
Respect confidentiality. Sharing personal struggles without consent can damage trust and increase feelings of vulnerability.
Always ask before involving others, unless safety is at immediate risk.
7. Don't Burn Yourself Out
Constantly prioritizing another's needs while neglecting your own can lead to emotional exhaustion. Recognize your limits and seek help when needed.
Supporting someone does not mean sacrificing your well-being.
Maintaining healthy boundaries while supporting someone with depression.
When to Seek Immediate Help
⚠️ Crisis Warning Signs
If the person you are supporting:
Talks about wanting to die
Expresses feelings of hopelessness or being a burden
Shows drastic behavioral changes
Engages in self-harm
Encourage immediate professional help. Contact mental health services, crisis helplines, or emergency services if necessary.
At PANHA, we emphasize that seeking urgent help is an act of care—not betrayal.
How PANHA Supports Mental Health?
PANHA is committed to promoting mental health awareness, reducing stigma, and providing compassionate support for individuals and families. We believe healing thrives in environments of empathy, education, and community.
By learning how to support those experiencing depression, we take a vital step toward creating safer, more understanding spaces for everyone.
Supporting someone with depression is not about having all the answers—it's about showing up with kindness, patience, and respect. Your presence can offer hope, even when words feel insufficient.
Remember:
You are not alone in this journey
You are allowed to set boundaries
Your support truly matters
Together, through compassion and awareness, we can make mental health care more human, accessible, and stigma-free.
Need Professional Mental Health Support?
At PANHA Cares, we provide evidence-based mental health support, therapy services, and caregiver resources. Whether you're supporting a loved one or seeking help yourself, our compassionate team is here for you.
Related Resources from PANHA:
🔗 Why Am I Feeling Sad for No Reason? Understanding Unexplained Sadness
🔗 Breaking the Silence: Teenage Mental Health Starts at Home
🔗 Psychology Training for Students & Mental Health Advocates
About PANHA
PANHA is dedicated to providing comprehensive mental health support, education, and resources. Our mission is to break the stigma around mental health and create safe spaces for healing and growth. Learn more about our mission and services.
Join the Conversation
Have you supported someone with depression? Share your experiences and insights in the comments below. Your story might help someone else.